12 posts tagged “boston”
There was an article on the internet magazine website, Slate. The author, Tim Harford, an economist, discussed sexism at Boston Area coffee shops and how bias would eventually effect the bottom line. There was a comments section after the article. You know I had to comment, right? See what I wrote below:
IT'S TRUE...
Ive made it to the front of a rush hour line at Dunkin, only to have the counter staff ask the white guy behind me for his order. As an African American woman living in Boston, I assumed racism was the reason I was refused restaurant service at The News in Chinatown, Jillian's in the Fenway, and Friday's (now closed) near the Fleet Center.
Maybe it was my gender all along. Who knew?
But the author of this article is correct, bad service will negatively effect the bottom line, whether its racism, sexism, nasty food, dirty bathrooms, healthcode violations, surly staff... Even in Boston, where rude service staff is considered part of the "local flavor," people will eventually get tired of spending their money where they are being mistreated. I personally refuse to return to establishments where my dinner/ date/ birthday celebrations, etc have been ruined by disrespectful, racist (or sexist) service staff. Nothing like coming home from a party and having to make a written complaint to a restaurant/ hotel/ taxi service. It really leaves a bad taste in your mouth.
At some point, it becomes a public accomodations law/ tourism issue. Boston is known all over the country for the white kid stabbing the Black man with the American Flag on City Hall Plaza. You start to wonder how long Boston is willing to perpetuate the image of being the most biased city outside of Mississippi. The color of money... is green.
When my family friends and business associates come in from out of town, there are only three, maybe four, places where I take them to eat. The food is mediocre. But these are the places where we are treated well. Like we were... I dont know... customers, or potential repeat business or something.
I live in Downtown. You cant get grits in my neighborhood. I heard tell you can get some in the South End. But even if they cooked them correctly (which is always questionable in Boston) you cant get salmon cakes. MsVee took me to some place in Mattapan Square that served grits and salmon cakes. But the service was PISS POOR (It took forty minutes to get a water, sixty minutes to get our food, and then the order was wrong. Did I tell you about the wet garbage under the table?). After that disaster, I gave up, resigned myself to the the #4 at Dunkin, sausage "egg" and "cheese" on a toasted english muffin with french vanilla hot cream and two sugars. At least I could get some mystery meat sausage, prefabricated eggs and some orange colored oil and water biproduct (American "cheese"). Well, at least I recognized the english muffin ((sigh)).
But this morning, I just couldnt take it. I REALLY wanted some normal food for breakfast. I woke up craving grits and salmon cake and eggs scrambled hard. I also wanted pancakes, hot sauce and honey... frosty orange juice... But mostly I wanted grits.
So I sat up in bed and began to scheme a way to get some grits. Had to go to a grocery store to get them, but which one? Johnnie Foodmaster's (Charlestown) is a train ride and a walk along the highway. Shaw's (Somerville) is three train stops and a bus ride. Star Market (Fenway) is about ten stops on the train and a half mile walk. So I would have to get the eggs in my neighborhood at Brooks now Rite Aid on the way back... I thought, "Wait a minute, Whole Foods (organic food grocery store) in my neighborhood has all that exotic world food, maybe they have grits."
I waited till after eight oclock to call over to Whole Foods:
WholeFoods Asian Woman: Hello Whole Foods. How can I direct your call?
ChezNiki: Um Hi. Say, do you carry grits?
Do you want em cooked, instant, or cook em yourself?
((Damn?!?!!)) Well Ma'am, Ill buy em anyway you have them.
Okay, well hold on.
Whole Foods Black Guy: Hello, can I help you?
Hi. I was just calling to find out if you guys sell grits.
You want em cooked or will you cook them yourself?
((Wow)) Okay, well I guess Ill cook them myself.
Yes. We have them.
Ill be right over.
Okay Ma'am.
I went to CVS, but only to use the ATM. After repeatedly following Black customers through their stores, and illegally refusing my EBT card, I no longer shop at CVS. I went to Whole Foods and looked and looked but I did not see any grits. Finally, I went to the help desk and they got one of the stock guys to walk me over. They werent in the cereal, oatmeal aisle. The grits were with the Polenta in the flour, baking soda, pancake mix aisle [?!?!?!]. So I bought them.
Here they are, Yall. Organic Yellow Grits:
Its a new day! LOL
AuRevoir!
...Im not a player, I just crush a lot
GRAMPA
Grampa never did call me back. He did that "Ill call you right back" sh*t. He playing bullsh*t games already and we didnt even f*ck yet? Its like going on a second interview and then never getting a call or a letter from the employer. You know you were rejected but youre not sure why.
OLD JOB IN BOSTON
Ran screaming from Maximus. Actually it was the Supervisor's screaming... slaming doors, barking orders and refusal to answer any questions that caused me to close my pocketbook, get my time sheet signed, and back slowly out the door. "Jim" is a spoiled racist incompetant b*tch, son of Irish Immigrants who moved to Southie when they got to America. After he went on a screaming tirade against another Black temp, who merely pointed out a mistake "Jim" made with the database, I got the f*ck up outta there. "Jim" woulda had one time to speak to me like that, and I already told yall, Im not catching a charge before I take the Bar again.
NEW JOB IN CAMBRIDGE
Now Im doing Auditing/Contract Administration for a bio-tech firm in Cambridge. Lots of crunchy scientist types over there. My first interview was with a girl in jeans and flip flops. No yelling. Lots of free food. Flat screen TVs, microwaves and free coffee in the break room. Free shuttle bus pass. I just review contracts all day and no one bothers me. Today I was given my "starter kit," office and desk supplies (ruler, pens, post-its, staples, tape dispenser, etc) all together in an easy to carry container (a clean black plastic garbage can). Wow, competence! So refreshing. I take the shuttle in and walk home, have to get my exercise in, what with all that free food at the office! LOL
BOSTON POPS POLITICS
Ive started rehearsals for Boston Pops Gospel Night. Ive been behind the scenes on the internet causing trouble as always. Found out that neither the BSO (Boston Symphony Orchestra) nor the BMA (Black Ministerial Alliance) thought they needed to actively promote Gospel Night, like we can afford to lose any more Black traditions in Boston, like the city doesnt need healing, like the playing field is level. Im doing my own promotion, in spite of, because of, cause cant nobody do it like I do. After my appeal to promote Gospel Night on a Grassroots Level went out to about nine of my Boston friends (politicians, photographers, artists, columnists, singers, and attorneys) I heard back from several of them ...and the BSO. Seems that the BSO has assembled staff members to promote Gospel Night, picture that! I even heard from a Sister from the BMA. Though, I seriously doubt the BMA leadership knows that she intends to take this to some of the membership.
Think about it. If there was a Gospel Concert at Lincoln Center, a skilled Guest Maestro and well-known Gospel Icon were featured, and members of Abyssinian were singing, Rev. Butts would have a block of discounted tickets in the church office by the day after the tickets came out. In Boston, the BMA has yet to promote Gospel Night... too busy protest-marching against gay marriage, I guess ((shrugging))
BOSTON POPS GOSPEL NIGHT
((Exhaling)) Now that I got that out of my system... The music we are learning is SOO beautiful. A good mix of classic and contemporary gospel. We have one song with a childs solo and another song featuring a gospel rap solo (we had our first rap solo in last years concert). BostonPopsGospelNight celebrates its Fifteenth Anniversary this year. Our Guest Maestro is Charles Floyd and our guest soloist is Marvin Winans. Boston Pops Gospel Night is on Saturday June 16th at 8pm at Boston Symphony Hall on MassAve and Huntington. Tickets are $18-$85.
DV DUMBA$$
JohnOrlowski, 49 gets the Dumba$$ of the Year award. Already in jail for Domestic Violence, this fool make friends with a hitman, while they are inside. When they are released, he hires the hitman to kill his wife, mother in law and seven year old daughter. He even instructed the hitman on how many bullets to use on each family member and not to shoot his daughter in the head, because he wanted her to have an open casket funeral (?!?!?) The HITMAN became squeamish about shooting a seven year old and helped the FBI get the fool on tape. He was rearrested and appeared in Federal Court in Boston this Monday. Men who commit domestic violence (and child molesters) have an incurable mental illness. They need to be put down like mad dogs.
GRATUITOUS PICTURES OF FOINE BLACK MEN FROM WWW.RUNDU.COM
Peace and Blessings to the family and friends of fallen soldier Pfc. Joseph Anzack Jr, 20. May he Rest In Peace.
2:32am May 1st, 2007 ((siren, light and voice fire alarm go off, throwing nightgown on, sticking my head out the front door, seeing neighbor walking the hall, ringing small hand bell))
What's going on?
Im ringing the alarm
Is it a fire?
I dont know
Well Im coming down anyway
Do you want me to wait for you?
Oh no Man, Im all set, Im right behind you
2:37am May 1st, 2007 ((walking down the hall in boots, no socks, jeans, no drawers, nightgown on backwards, coat, zipped up, cell phone in pocket, pocket book on arm containing passport, wallet, keys, tying hair up in scarf, ol' lady neighbor in hallway))
The second alarm didnt ring
I know
I hate when this happens
Me too
Ima call down to the front desk and see what's happening
Hmm Okay ((leaving down the staircase, walking down from seven, with the other Black and Latino neighbors who are from the 'hood and dont play with no fire alarm in the middle of the night, wtf?))
2:39am May 1st, 2007 ((out front now with seven fire trucks, three with their ladders up, Black female firefighter putting the hydrant together, two ambulances, three police cars, NBC news truck, three nosey a$$ cab drivers, the street cleaner zamboni, about forty of my neighbors, some inside the doorway with young children and newborns, Im crossing the street with my photographer neighbor))
Hey!
Hey Gurl!
Im tired of these people burning their food ((taking pictures))
Okay?!?! But what are they cooking? I burn my food all the time and I never set off the whole building. If you open the front door the whole building goes off! Take some pictures off those fools on their terrace looking off...
I dont have my long lens. I met that chick who had the fire last time. She's not wrapped too tight ((circling left ear with index finger))
Yeah, I met her on the grocery store bus one time.
Well, once she told me that the white woman who was running against Deval Patrick...whats her name?
I know who you mean
Well once she told me that Kerry Healey had some good points during the debates? I stopped speaking to her.
Sayin'! I just got back to sleep. I fell asleep with the TV on, and the Emergency alert woke me up at 12 Midnight, talking about some Amber Alert. Non-custodial parent taking her child? I just got back to sleep... and then this!
Too many false alarms, I wouldnt be down here now, except to take pictures.
Well, being Im from New York, I leave any building that sounds any alarm of any kind.
I understand. We have a lot of new young mothers in the building.
They do need to keep it full
Yeah but they gonna make a mistake like they did when the building first opened
What's that?
Moving in a whole bunch of folks who ((whispering)) ...dont know how to live Downtown
Un uhn! ((laughing))
See you later!
Alright!
2:47am May 1st, 2007 ((still across the street, calling my sister on the cell, she picks up groggy))
Hello?
Hey, sorry to call you. But Im outside my building with six firetrucks, two EMS and the Eyewitness News
Un uhn!
I wouldnt have called, but it looks serious. They have three ladders up on the building. Man, we were just taking about carrying your box out during a fire. All I had to take this time is my passport, license and debit card. I can replace everything else with those.
Wow!
Well, Im just calling to say Im okay. Ill call back if the building blows up or something
No we can stay on longer
Okay... Sayin' its almost three oclock. Im never out this late, even when I go to the club, Im home by now. Im seeing stuff Ive never seen before. Empty cabs, I even saw a street cleaner machine! I been here six years and Ive never seen the street cleaner!
((both laughing))
I even saw a Black lady firefighter with dreds out front hooking up the hydrant.
Yeah?
They say it was somebody's stove again. But I wanna know how you can have a kitchen fire on an electric stove. Then again, when you cooking and your alarm goes off, everybody knows you wave it with a kitchen towel and open a window... what is it? Deydohknow? This their first apartment??!?!
Okay?!?!?
Oh ...they retracting the ladders, so I guess we can go back in. Sorry to call so late.
That's okay
Alright, Ill talk to yall later
3:15am May 1st, 2007 ((crossing back, walking toward building, talking to the Sista Firefighter))
Hey
Hello
((whispering)) Im glad to see a Sista working on the force. Im proud to see you.
Thank you.
3:17am May 1st, 2007 ((in the lobby, with neighbors all in pajamas, boots and coats, hair f*cked up, trying to listen to the convo between security and the Firemen to get the scoop))
Can we go up? Are the elevators on?
I hope so, I dont wanna walk up
I know what you mean
I smell smoke
Me too
((Big Burly Black Fireman in Charge makes an announcement))
Yall can go upstairs now, its safe
((half the neighbors stay downstairs to get the gossip, I go upstairs, Its a small building, I can get the scoop tomorrow morning))
3:45am May 1st, 2007 ((calling downstairs to security, leaving a message))
Hi. This is ChezNiki in seven twenty-six its about ten of four and the fire alarm in my apartment is still on. When you get a chance... not an emergency or anything, could you call back and tell me if I should leave out again or what? Thanks.
3:49am May 1st, 2007 ((phone ringing, reading Caller ID, its Security calling back))
Hello?
Hi. This is Eddie from Security.
Yeah
Everything's okay, Grinell is coming out now to turn those alarms off. Their truck just pulled up outside.
Oh okay. What happened earlier?
There was strong smoke coming out of the laundry room through the vent all the way up to nine and ten and I didnt want to take no chances
No. No, gotta play it safe. Nothing wrong with that. Okay, well thank you.
Okay. Good Night.
* I sleep naked
...that I wasnt surprised by Imus, Kramer, Mel... or Isaiah?
...that Sharpton and Jesse only work together when they can both get some spotlight?
...that you cant change minds, only behavior... and sometimes the behavior changes occur only after a civil lawsuit?
...that the EasterMurder on the Cape where Dr. Ann Gryboski murdered her battering husband Patrick Lancaster, a handyman, sounded like an accident waiting to happen. You know he thought he had a good deal at first, being a doctors husband, living on the Cape, in a nice house, laying up on the couch between 'jobs'... then he started beating on her to regain some of his manhood. Dang, sometimes even white ladies in Barnstable County have to resort to street justice.
...that Comedianne Mo'Nique could read the phone book and I would think its funny.
...that BeBounce could sing AveMaria at the Vatican and I wouldnt be impressed
...that regardless if she is singing Cater to You, Freakum Dress, Irreplaceable, or Survivor, she somehow always winds up half naked, on the floor, wet, and/or crawling with her a$$ open and up in the air in the video? Maybe she really is only 25? ((shrugging shoulders))
...that the ChocolateJesus was banned at that art gallery in New York City? Was it because he was sans loin cloth (bucket nekked), because he was anotomically correct (Jesus with a Johnson)... or was it because he was dark brown? (always knew he was a Brother!)
...that the City of Boston didnt call the State or the Fed in to investigate the rash of murders (up 200% from this time last year) until a white woman from New York was killed... and until the Guardian Angels reassembled and arrived?
...that the so-called "gun sniffing dogs" the Fed brought to Boston last week didnt turn around and sniff out the gun of the officer holding the leash? And whyd the dogs only find one gun and a machete in all of Dorchester?
...that even though the most I will get from the settlement is like $450, Im glad that someone has finally brought a class action against my BarReview company for anti-trust?
...that former US Senator and Law and Order actor Fred Thompson is running for President?
...that I will never admit it, but Original Law & Order is falling off? The thrill is gone
...that I feel like Im cheating when I watch CSI:Miami, Cold Case and Without a Trace? I mean two years ago I wouldnt be caught dead watching CBS.
...that this Brother, below... He's my husband and I dont even know his name...
...that I love to post gratuitous pics of foine Black men on my webpages? I mean is this really necessary?
...that kids had to Easter egg hunt in their snowsuits this past Sunday?
...that I went to my first Sunrise Easter Service this year at the waterfront at Christopher Columbus Park in the North End (Boston) and thoroughly enjoyed the singing, the short sermon, communing with Nature, the lack of traffic on the roads, and the lack of clothing-induced drama? One girl came in her pajamas and shirpa boots! And then, after distribution of RedEasterEggs (Greek Paschalina Auga), and a stroll through the North End, I got to go home and sleep all day in between NBA games! I think I may start a new Easter tradition with myself. I really enjoyed my Easter!
7:45am April 8th, 2007
ChezMom: Did you actually see the Sunrise?
ChezNiki: I saw it on the way there. Sunrise was 6:16am, but the service started at 6:30am
ChezMom: So how was it?
ChezNiki: COLD! I think it was like 30 degrees. The Preacher talked about seeing Jesus through your tears, having hope, and renewal...
ChezMom: Well did you listen to her?
ChezNiki: Yeah.
ChezMom: Good!
SouthBronx: Well if it was just you, or just me, I would say something different. But its not us, this is happening to all professionals of color in New England, everybody I talk to. Jackie moved back here, Samantha, Sara Shay... I saw on the internet where ten thousand people left Eastern Mass just last year alone. I bet those were people of color who couldn’t get their careers started.
WestEnd: ...Natti moved home last month. Venia said she's gonna go home and move in with her mother in Brooklyn. She cant take it anymore. Debra moved there with her new husband...
SouthBronx: ...and took six of his kids with ‘em
WestEnd: ((laughing)) Sh*t! My shrink is Jewish and she even moved to New York!
SouthBronx: ((laughing)) Yeah, there’s nothing for us up there. Bea fought tooth and nail to put herself through school, all that promise for finishing your education and she’s working in childcare!
WestEnd: Working where?
SouthBronx: Childcare. Nothing wrong with working in childcare, if you want to... but that’s not her field.
WestEnd: Sayin’! Its like a punishment if you have your degree up here.
SouthBronx: I say take the job they are offering, but don’t for a moment stop looking for work outside of New England. The only difference, instead of being home on your computer looking for work, you will be on their computer looking for work. Just make enough so that you don’t have to move back home before you are ready... you know without a job.
WestEnd: Sayin’! But just once, just once, I really want to ask those people at the employment agencies, "You are a legal search firm and I am an attorney. Why are you sending me to a filing job with the State?" or "I have more education than you and everyone sitting on the left side of your office. Why are you trying to send me to a f*cking data entry position?"
SouthBronx: That’s part of the problem too.
WestEnd: Oh what? You think they jealous?
SouthBronx: Yeah and racist. You already know the answer. They would never tell the truth.
WestEnd: Yeah, but I would love to ask them directly and see them squirm. One day I just want to get on the phone and ask them, "Yo! What the f*ck?!?!?"
((both laughing))
...From Next Level Entertainment (my answers are in black)
We have been receiving an unbelievable response to our questions last night that pertain to your thoughts of Boston and what you would like to have changed. Once again, we look forward to your feed back. Here are the final follow up questions:
1. What positive experiences have you had that would keep you here in Boston?
I think I may be the wrong person to answer these survey(s). Every good experience I’ve had in Boston was immediately followed by that Bullsh*t. As a single Black Woman professional, I have to fight really hard to have any sort of life in Boston (social, professional, spiritual), and then when I get it, it s*cks. Its like being a mule following the proverbial carrot on a stick for miles, only to find out later it was a plastic carrot all along.
2. What professional expectation would you like to reach while in Boston?
I would like to return to work. I’ve been out of (full time) work for two years. I have two college degrees and ten years experience in my field, a clean CORI, good references and no one has hired me for full time work yet.
3. How is Boston supporting you to pursue your career?
It isnt. The job fairs and networking events I’ve been to were sponsored by private companies. Most of the jobs at those events were for the service industry, retail sales or office work. After a while, I just stopped going to those.
The employment agencies I am registered with are sending me to filing, receptionist and data entry jobs.
Sometimes my choir members give me job leads. None of them have resulted in a permanent job.
4. If you could change three things to keep young professionals here in Boston, what would they be
Other than Black-owned rental hall(s), which I mentioned in the last email, I have four suggestions:
a. A website where we can get information on basic survival in Boston, ie. hair care, jobs, parking, social events, Black-friendly restaurants/ hotels/ clubs/retail stores/ car rentals (so that we don’t spend money in those that arent), waiting lists for subsidized rental housing, location of churches/ mosque/ temple/ kingdom hall, etc. No message board (that didn’t work), just information.
b. Black-owned car service(s). Servicing Eastern Mass for people who travel, work, play and dance at night, don’t have a curfew and need to get back home. (Side Bar: When I travel, I actually have to schedule my return flights/ bus/ train to Boston for before 11pm, to make sure I reach Boston before the subway stops running. I do this to be sure I can get home even if no cab will pick me up)
c. Rent Stabilization
d. Dating Service. For professional people of color, ie on line service, speed dating or other events specifically for the purpose of us to meet/ date each other. I’ve been to a couple events in Boston and New York. I didn’t find a husband, but at least it gave me some hope that something good could happen for me in that arena.
Note: I use "Black people" and "people of color" interchangeably because I hear the same complaints from Latino and Asian people I speak to, as well. Hope this helps.
-ChezNiki
Yesterday (2/5/07) the new Attorney General of Massachusetts, MarthaCoakley, held a press conference on the AquaTeenForce incident in Boston on January 31st.
Turner Broadcasting and Interference, Inc (the marking firm) settled out of court with the State of Massachusetts for about two million and a public apology. Half of the funds will go to the State for public education on public safety/ homeland security issues. The other half will be distributed proportionately between the three effected Cities/Towns (Boston, Cambridge and Somerville) based on amount of police services used on that day. She also indicated that the "LightBrite Boards" looked like advertisement at night, but during the day it looked like an incendiary device.
The AG went on to say, that we found out that this was, "much ado about nothing", due to a perceived threat. She reiterated that the fire and police force did exactly what they were supposed to do under the circumstances. But she also recognized that Turner Broadcasting had been more than generous under the circumstances, and had agreed to pay without dragging the issue on for years in a lawsuit.
She could not speak on the two guys who actually placed the signs because they were in the midst of their own lawsuit with their own attorneys, but this settlement will probably effect their cases. She also hoped that in this day and age that companies would rethink their advertising tactics, and plan different marketing based on different locales. She then introduced the mayors of the effected towns, Boston (Menino), Somerville (Curtatone) and Cambridge (Reeves).
Mayor Menino, who looked and sounded visibly shaken... probably angry, because Boston didnt get more money, came to the mic to praise the emergency response team. He called the advertising "Guerilla Tactics." I dont think it was a slip of the tongue.
Mayor Curtatone, who I couldnt pick out of a line-up (I live the next town over and I have literally never even seen a picture of him), also commented on the police response.
Brother Mayor Ken Reeves, reported that seven to nine little french fry men were found all over Cambridge on public landmarks, such as at Harvard Stadium, MIT and Technology Square, where a lot of biotech and scientific experimentation is conducted. He went on to say that this incident was a wake-up call. If two paid "artists" could get into these areas and place devices on these important landmark buildings, it would be rediculously easy for a t*rrorist to place harmful devices in the same places.
CHEZNIKI POV
Luuv-ded the AG in this press conference. Our new AG, the first female Attorney General of Massachusetts, appeared calm, competetent and in control of all of these frightened men. Also, she used her lawyering/ negotiation skills to simultaneously smooth over the hysteria and get a little money for the State. Would love to hear the back story on why Menino was so worked up and out of breath during that press conference, though.
The first device was found due to a call from someone on the subway, who allegedly saw the devise out the window of the Orange line. Yeah right! When is the last time you were able to see anything but dirt and scratch marks on a subway window on the T? I think one of the street team called it in... from their living room couch. This campaign happened in nine other cities. In NYC no one noticed the LightBrites, so when they got to Boston someone probably had to call, to get attention.
Turner Broadcasting can afford to drop 2Mil on Boston without batting an eye. Besides, they couldntve paid for better advertising had they planned it that way. Think about it. Id never heard of Aqua Teen Hunger Force until a week ago. Now folk all over the country will be Googling it, watching it... I even heard that the leftover LightBrite Boards are selling on Ebay.
The AG was right about one thing. Any company hoping to advertise in Boston, will have to alter their ads and do more background research. People here just think differently than... the rest of the world.
The police response was overkill. That horse has been out of the barn for five years, People! As a New Yorker living in Boston, I feel like its too late to inconvenience all of Eastern Mass everytime someone Downtown belches. They already let the WTC t*rrorists fly two planes out of Logan five years ago. Dont try to tighten up security now! With the regular racial profiling at Logan Airport, and Massport (the State Agency that runs the Airport) being run by a friend of the Governor, the t*rrorists knew exactly which airport to use back in 2001.
The State and Local police need to find out who is shooting up our youth in the hood, and who keeps burning young women to death in the outer towns, and how to keep the homeless indoors and alive during this cold snap. We have local fish to fry. We simply dont have time to chase french fry boxes.
...Peace
I organized my apartment building's Super Bowl Party this year. It was pretty good. We had about twenty-five party-goers. The building is ten years old and this was our first Super Bowl Party. We have a lot of social events at my building: movie nights, cookouts, holiday parties, one resident fell in love and sponsored an adult Valentine's Day party, all organized by the Community Relations Committee (made up of residents and one management). But this was our very first Super Bowl Party. Now you have to understand two things about my building to understand the social dynamic of this party:
1. The average age in my building is forty-one. No forty-one year olds actually live in my building. My building's residents include about half senior citizens and half young families with young children, and
2. The Community Room is alcohol-free
So after making a last minute run to the liquor store (needed a little nip before the party, so I could deal with all the neighbors). And two hours of decorating, food prep and moving the rented 32" out of the security closet, the following is a list of:
THINGS I OBSERVED DURING SUPER BOWL XLI
Half the room stand up for the National Anthem during the Pre-Game sung and signed by Billy Joel and Marlee Maitlin. Most of whom were children under fifteen (public school brain-washing)
That first Chicago goal off the kick-off! Doot Doo!
The adults devouring the sweets table... some came back later with tupperwares, "I really shouldnt, but these were good!" Meanwhile the kids were chowing down at the "real food" table, grabbing bowls of chili, chicken wings, cheese dip, even drinking water, when soda was available (?!??!!).
The Black History Month CocaCola bottle shape commercial.
The young white boy who ruined the Half Time Pool Contest* for everyone by cheating.** Its free, son? How are you gonna cheat at a game that doesnt involve money?
That same little monster winning the contest. His final bid was Colts by one. Halftime score was Colts by Two. He was the closest without going over, so the little bastard won the prize... which was the winter scarf I made to promote my new business. Ima still use his picture on my website, though.
"But he has an axe!"
Prince in blue, orange, heels and a durag playing the h*ll out of his guitar(s) in the rain during the Half-Time show. He's gotta be like fifty now, but he STILL got it. Considering everyone else in the room was over fifty or under fifteen, I was the only one singing along. One little Black girl asked her friend, "This is what he wears to play in the Super Bowl?"
FAMU doin the d*mn thing with Prince during the Half-Time show. Super Bowl ExElEye had two Black coaches, Prince and an HBCU marching band rocking out in their glow-in-the-dark headgear.
That's alright, now!!! ((rolling neck, hand up, 'chuch'-style))
His Purple Badness playing his purple p*nis guitar in silhouette toward the end of the set for like three minutes. Network suits were scared of a little flash of boob two years ago. Wardrobe malfunction? What about a Sexy Silhouette malfunction? Even a seven second delay wouldnt have caught that one... serves em right!
The neighbor who had to leave after half-time because it was past her bedtime.
The chess game that broke out during the third quarter amongst the Asian neighbors (it wasnt soccer, so the game was boring after half time).
That most of the room was supporting Chicago... one temporary Colts fan, a senior, said she was going the other way, because "If the Colts could beat the Pats, they must be pretty good."
The neighbor who brought his pre-algebra homework downstairs during fourth quarter.
The elderly lady who sat four rows back, but complained she couldnt see the score, "ChezNiki! ChezNiki! Whats the score? Who's winning?" To which I replied, "The Colts are still winning, Ms. Angela." ((and if you moved to the front row, you could see for yourself))
The neighbor who came back down from his apartment at 10pm just to help me lift the TV off the table to the dolly.
The Colts winning and all of us being surprised ...well except the Asian father who had just wrapped up a chess tutorial with his sons. He supported the Colts from the very beginning.
Dungy on the stage thanking God and meaning it. The commetators mentioned that he did not yell at, cuss and degrade his players like most NFL coaches do. He didnt lead by fear, he led by respect...
Manning on the stage holding the trophy, dazed, wet and happy!
My fourteen year old neighbor asking me, "Ely and Peyton, they related?"
Ms. Angela helping with the dishes during clean-up, just before she tried (again) to get me and another neighbor to join her Catholic church down the block.
Even without (much) alcohol and with all the kids, I observed that this party topped the hot mess SuperBowlParty I attended last year.
...and the very last thing(s) I observed were the insides of my eyelids after I got upstairs to my apartment... I was exhausted!
Tell me about your own "EX EL EYE" Experience in the Comments.
*Rules of the Half-Time Pool game: Partygoers guess which team will be winning by half time and by how many points. Guessing ends at the beginning of the second quarter. The closest without going over wins a prize.
**The little monster's mother left him downstairs by himself. He proceded to work my last nerve by: changing his bid four times, yelling and dancing in front of the TV, mocking and teasing other party goers who were "losing the contest", standing in front of the contest board so people couldnt bid, yelling at people while they were making their guess. I took the magic marker away and finally took the contest board off the wall and put it on the floor, under my chair until halftime. The little psycho sat in front of my chair, his back to the TV pointing and yelling at the sign for ten minutes until I couldnt take it anymore. When I see unruly white thirteen year olds, I have flashbacks to my private high school. I finally I told him,
"Yo! The Super Bowl is on! The TV is over there and you are over here watching a piece of cardboard! Now does that make any sense? Get away from my chair! NOW" I needed to sneak a second drink in the back room after that.
SouthBronx 11:30:31: Heard yall were scared by a LightBrite
WestEnd: ((Laughing)) Well that first one did look like a b*mb. Maybe someone stole the the little french fry man off the front. But after they noticed that the others were a promotion, they should have called off the dogs.
SouthBronx: Boston needs to understand, nobody wants to b*mb yall. They not thinking about Boston.
WestEnd: ((Laughing)) This ol lady on the grocery store bus on Wednesday was saying the same thing. She said, "If they wanted to get us, they woulda done it when they hit New York, I dont think theyre gonna bother with us." Did yall see the guys who did it down there?
SouthBronx: Yeah. White guy with dredlocks?
WestEnd: Yeah, theyre trying the charge them with disorderly conduct and some bogus "hoax device" charge.
SouthBronx: Hoax What?!?!?!
WestEnd: It one of those new post- 9/11 laws. Its against the law to plant a fake b*mb. They need to fine those guys for trespass or something and let them go.
SouthBronx: They said they did it in New York, but no one noticed.
WestEnd: Too much weird stuff already going on down there for anyone to notice a cartoon box of fries
SouthBronx: I was on the train yesterday with a guy wearing a leather homemade turban with a snake on it, dressed in all red with red boots and nobody noticed. We all just kept on riding the train. It would take more than a cartoon to make us notice.
WestEnd: TurnerBroadcasting came out and offered to cover the cost of the scare. Then Menino came out and said it cost several million. See? Why they tryina make Turner pay for the BigDig?!?!!
SouthBronx: Un Uhn! ((Both Laughing))
